POSSIBLE POSITIVITY

I just realized that I've been putting up too much negativity in this blog. Most (if not all) of my posts were about my mid-life crisis angst and random rants about my so-called-life which most people would not even give a damn for. I feel like I owe something to the few people who waste their precious time to read/check my blog and to the poor souls that get lost here by randomly googling stuff like "effy-stonem-you're-making-me-mad-quotes".

So to show my appreciation for YOU GUYS and to prove that I'm not all about being miserable and depressed, I'm going to commit myself to add more substance and life to this blog in the coming days. No, maybe not in the coming days. Why not start today by sharing something lively and happy-just for a change?

Alright here we go. Here's three things that made me very happy for the past weeks:


1. I won a blog giveaway! 
Yeay! I was one of three winners of 3 pairs of tights and 30USD credit in ROMWE. How cool is that? Really cool! And guess who hosted the blog giveaway where I won? It's from The Boy Dressed for Many Occasions, none other than my ultimate guy crush in lookbook-Bobby Raffin! I wasn't really expecting to win anything I just drop a comment and added my email-add just in case. Haha! I really can't believe I won! And Bobby even informed me personally thru a reply in my comment in LB. How cool is that? SUPER COOL! I was jumping all around when I found out. Just the thought of how lucky I got still brings a smile on my face- and that is worth so much more than the prize! :)

2. I'm going to be part of a secret project!

It's still a secret so I can't tell you what it is. Sorry, but don't worry I'll share it for sure once it's done. Pinky swear? What I can tell you is it's something new, fun and exciting! :)


3. I'm going to have my first blog collaboration!

Pull the trigger

Seriously, I still can't believe this one. Though I had doubts at first if it's just a spam or what, I somewhat got convinced to fool myself into believing it's somewhat true because they replied to my email and gave me permission to use photos from their site. Okay. I don't want to give myself false expectations so I'll just dwell on the thought of waking up one morning and be surprised by a package-it's like receiving gifts from Santa! I'll keep you posted once this dream comes true. :)

So that's it for my first attempt for a better blog. Do you have tips, suggestions or any violent reactions for me? Feel free to let me know. Don't worry cos I'm pretty open-minded, well sometimes. :P

I'll leave you with the music video of my current pick-me-up/shower song.
*top secret* I actually dance like Jessie does in her black and white graffiti overalls whenever this song plays.

HAPPY DANCING!!!

LET'S CHICKEN OUT

from http://www.flickr.com/photos/pawawa/

Today, I decided to apply for a job at the mall near our place. There were already a lot of people at the lobby when I arrived. After signing on the log sheet, I realized that I forgot to bring a pen. (Darn it!) So, I rushed out to buy one at the bookstore. I know you think that I should've just borrowed from someone but I'm not really fond of borrowing things unless I don't have any options left and besides I'm not comfortable in talking to strangers. After a few minutes, I came back and filled out the forms then  submitted them with my resume. I sat and waited among other applicants. I was so nervous. My hands were so sweaty that I swear you can squeeze out a few drops of sweat from my hanky (Eew! that's gross, IKR. Peace) I was just able to relax after taking down 3 pills for my anxiety (it usually just takes 1 to calm me down).While waiting for the processing, I received a text message from my sister telling me that the hospital I applied to 2 weeks ago just called and was asking if I'm still interested to pursue my application. In my mind I was like: "Darn! I forgot to bring my pen earlier and now this? Is it fate telling me that I shouldn't have gone here in the first place?" I don't want to sound so superstitious but I'm just super superstitious. So without further thinking, I stood up and walked away. I chickened out. :( 


WAHH!!! Why do I always chicken out whenever I get faced with these kind of adversities? I don't know. I just hope I did not made the wrong decision (again) by running away (again).With the Christmas season fast approaching, I really need to get a life. I badly need a job outside home to keep me busy so that I won't get too affected by my stupid SAD. I don't know if getting a job will help get my life back and make me happy (I really hope so) but I want to be able to say: At least, I'm not as sad as I used to be.

**Chicken Little photos from Google Images

HAPPINESS IS A CHOICE

Today is my Dad's 66th Birthday.


I just realized that I can't remember the last time I've greeted him a Happy Birthday. Perhaps that was way too long ago when I was still too young to remember things. Or maybe because I just don't see the point in wishing him a happy birthday when I really don't want that for him. For the longest time,I felt like he did not deserve happiness when I was not happy myself.

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance; the wise grows it under his feet.  ~James Openheim

I have been searching for true happiness (like who else doesn't?) but it's just now that I've realized I've been looking for it in the wrong places. 


Happiness is a choice. We, ourselves, are the only ones who can choose what would make us happy. And that, one can only be happy when you share your happiness with others for happiness held is a seed; and happiness shared is the flower.


I know it's already late now but I still believe in the saying : "It's better late than never!"

HAPPY Birthday Daddy!  

I really wish with all my heart that you are truly happy now...wherever you are. For if you already found happiness, I can hope that someday I'll be able to find it too.

me with my brother and sister @ my father's grave