This is kind of a late post. Last week I went to our province for my cousin/godchild's (FYI: I'm not really her godmother. She just calls me Ninang because I happen to have the same name as her "true" Ninang, so there) 7th birthday celebration. I didn't want to come at first cause I'm feeling lethargic (as always), but after a lot of ramblings from my Mom and sister and because of my insatiable love for icings (the icing on cakes in our province are the most divine!), I finally gave in.
It was a typical children's party: food, cake, balloons, gifts, games, clowns and everything. It was nothing out of the ordinary. Knowing myself, how I hate going to parties and anything "ordinary", I was sure I was going to regret coming. But surprisingly, I did enjoy. Okay so it wasn't really the actual party itself that I enjoyed but the realizations and nostalgia that it brought me.
The life of my relatives in the province is so simple, yet I don't see them lurking in sadness about their situation. They don't have much but they seem to be happy. Unlike me, who may not have everything but definitely have more than enough; I still find many reasons not to be happy. So why am I unhappy? What's wrong with me?
After giving much thought, I realized that maybe I am not really unhappy. I'm just not thankful and appreciative enough of what I have (or don't have) like them.
Happiness is not just a choice we make; it is more of a prize. We need to constantly search for what makes us happy, and once we have found it we need not be lax about it. It's like swimming in the ocean to get to an island; we need to do everything to stay afloat and to get there. A wave or storm may throw us down once in a while but we must not give up, no matter how lost we are at sea and no matter how difficult it is; we need to get back up for air and reach or search for our island.
So, I will not just choose happiness; I will fight for it with everything I got. Who knows, maybe I'll get lucky and win the prize. 'Cause, even though I may not be always happy, in every sense of the word, I am alive and that's enough...for now.
